Roundtables? Roundup.

Last week was, uh, not so good in the whole "posting new content" realm. Oh sure, we got around to some things, but when the number 1 tag of the week is "functionality" which is a fancy way of saying "post about how we don't have time to post" that ain't good.

I did host the Big Ten Blogger's roundtable, which was done "Jeopardy" style; I provided the answers, and the bloggers provided the questions. The participating blogs:

Off The Tracks
Enlightened Spartan
Happy Hour Valley
Maize and Blue Nation
Varsity Blue
The Nittany Line
Maize n' Brew
Boiled Sports
Lake the Posts
Ground Zero East Lansing
Black Heart Gold Pants
The Buckeye Battle Cry

Chances are you've read it already, but Black Heart Gold Pants used the format to launch into a celebrity Jeopardy parody of sorts involving JoePa. Read it, like, right now. No seriously, read it, then come back.

Now that you're back, lets take a look at some of the answers I provided, along with the correct questions:

Answer: Jay Paterno and the Spread HD

Most (read: all) went with a play on the fact that "spread" could applied to your legs, and that "HD" sounded a lot like "VD." The correct question, however, was "How the hell is this working so well" or "Surely Jay's just getting lucky here, right?"

Answer: Joe Tiller's Mustache

Full points to Maize n' Brew, who knew that whenever Joe Tiller's name is invoked, the correct answer is always:


Answer: The Color Purple

The correct question, of course, was "What is the classic novel by Alice Walker chronicling the life of Celie, a poor black woman in the rural South." Christ, do none of you read?

We also accepted "The color of Pat Fitzgerald's penis"

Answer: Brains

Full points all around here, as most took this softball and lobbed it out of the park. The correct answer was "What's for dinner?"

Answer: Hawkeye State

Hawkeye State is not Iowa, nor is it the "state" of fans of Iowa. I thought this was clear, and apparently it wasn't. I meant Iowa Blogger "Hawkeye State" of BHGP. We would have accepted anything involving an Elephant Walk.

Answer: Rudy

We accepted both Varsity Blue's succinct response of "Shitty Midget" as well as Happy Hour Valley's more lengthy response of "Who is a giant douche that managed to be the subject of an “inspiring film” about his lame-ass story of walking on to America’s most hated college football team and going from towel boy to getting a sack in his final home game despite being offsides?"

Answer: Knee Ligaments

The correct response was, of course, "aaaaaaaaaairgggggg" or any variation thereof.

Answer: Terrelle Pryor

Varsity Blue, again: "Why am: I fucking terrified of Ohio State?"

We also would have accepted any variation of "dumbo" "radar ears" or "holy hell this kid is going to destroy everything in his path for the next 3 years god-damnit why the hell does Ohio State get these kids, Columbus isn't even that cool, fuuuuuuck."

Answer: Mark May

Ground Zero East Lansing sums it up thusly: "Who is the biggest benefactor of the "Ugly Friend" effect? You know the theory - all sets of girls have one ugly friend that makes the others look better by comparison. Who is Mark May's ugly friend? You guessed it...Lou Holtz"

Answer: Rich Rodriguez

Boiled Sports: Who fooled Michigan?

Well played, for this season.

And that wraps up the wrap up. Sorry for the delay, and enjoy your Monday!